Q: I have been dating this guy now for about two months. We met through mutual friends. Both of us are in our 30’s and have never been married. I am really into him until just recently, he has started to ask about my every move. He is asking me questions about my whereabouts and now about my legitimate “guy friends.” What is going on here?
A: These are symptoms of what I call the “J-bone” (also known as the jealous bone). Some men have this bone in their body and some do NOT! Since you have only been dating AND it has been only two months, I would say, GET OUT NOW! Get out while you can because I have seen this pattern with men (and women) before and if you allow the relationship to deepen, your way out will be much more difficult down the line where another bone pops up: the “psycho bone.” No man nor woman likes when the psycho bone shows itself, especially in the one you are dating.
Jealousy is a serious issue in relationships and even in marriage. You have probably heard the adage, “Once bitten twice shy.” A jealous person most likely has a good reason for feeling this very negative emotion and this very good reason usually has nothing to do with you. It stems back to some previous relationship where they were wronged through distrust somehow. That person should either “get over it” or they may seek some help from a coach or a counselor to help them work through it. It is a serious challenge and must be confronted head on or it will linger through life in most, if not all, of their relationships.